Read e-book online Chump Change PDF

By David Eddie

ISBN-10: 030736903X

ISBN-13: 9780307369031

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We lapsed into silence. That seemed to sum it up. Somehow, I thought the conversation about Ruth would last longer. I wondered what she was up to at that moment. Not thinking fondly of me, you could bet. My name was probably already a swearword in her family: “Ow! Son of a Dave! I Daved my Daving toe! Honey! ” I looked out the window, watched the scenery roll by: trees, farms, fences. Cows, crops. “Hey,” I said, sitting up. ” “I know,” Max said calmly. “I’m not taking you to the city. I’m taking you to the country, for a little R&R.

Well, I too am a sensitive plant. I need water, air, sunshine; I need someone to whisper sweet nothings into my tendrils, to play a little classical music in the background. In Manhattan, I wilted, my leaves drooped and turned brown, and — not to put too fine a point on it — I never wanted to have sex. If we had sex once a week it was a chore, a boring chore. Ruth took to calling me “the Cockroach,” because as soon as she came home I scuttled off into my hole, my “office,” converted from a walk-in closet, and didn’t come out until long after she went to sleep.

As if in a trance I arose, walked over to Madeleine’s office, and knocked on the door. “Come in,” said the voice from behind the door. I entered. Madeleine was hunched over her desk, looking over a crossword puzzle through a pair of little half-specs. When I sat down across from her, she looked at me over the tops of the specs. ” “Why? ” And then it all came tumbling out. With my face on fire, staring at my shoes (in shocking shape, I noticed), I confessed all: Marek, the shopping safaris, the long-distance phone calls.

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Chump Change by David Eddie

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